When Opportunity knocks...

should we really answer the door or should we just bolt it, chain it, turn off all the lights and pretend no one's home?

"It's an opportunity," people say, "you should be grateful that you have it at all." This is the response that I almost always get from people. Opportunities shouldn't be wasted, blah blah blah.

Blah.

I thought I had an opportunity around the last week of August. I was feeeling down about my current job. I felt like it didn't offer anything. No chance for growth, etc. So when this opportunity came along, I grabbed it with both hands and jumped right in.

Flash forward to now. I'm still jobless, at home, doing nothing, earning nothing. Blah.

IT SUCKS!!!!

I thought that what Dayan offered me was so great. It was a chance to Start Something. With friends, no less. But so far, nothing has happened. Issa and I are making kulit (well, actually Issa is making kulit--it's a good cop, bad cop kinda deal between us). But Dayan isn't biting. She's off in her own world doing something else. Meanwhile, Issa and I are stuck at home, twiddling our thumbs, waiting, hoping, PRAYING for the business deal to push through.

Issa thinks that it could be a test of patience from God. I think it's a test to see if we want something bad enough, hopefully we'll pull out all the stops to make it real. I don't know if we've been doing that though. Or maybe it's a test of faith. A test of willingness? I don't know...I'm confused.

I don't like thinking that maybe I've made a mistake. Maybe I should have had my bases covered first before I jumped in. What bases? It wasn't as if I was making any money off the old job. I could barely save as it was.

But I don't like having regrets. It was my decision to leave. I stick with the decision. But I can't help thinking, "was it such a bad job?" I'm not sure now. It's been too long to remember.

I'm not sure now what I'm supposed to do. I want to work, that's for sure. I'm afraid to start looking for a new job because it might coincide with the one with Dayan. Lord, I need your guidance. Please help.